Musings of an ADA
by Madhatter1981
Summary: In a universe where Bruce/Batman was able to save both Rachel/Harvey how would things turn out for the main characters if Batman wasn't blamed for anything was able to step down. From Rachel's POV.


**Musings of an A.D.A.**

Disclaimer: Don't own this, nor do I get any compensation from it. Just for fun.

A.D.A. Rachel Dawes-Dent sat in the living room of the well priced townhouse that she shared with her D.A. husband, Harvey thinking of her life. At the time she met Harvey she was simultaneously at the highest and lowest points of her life. Highest for being one of the youngest A.D.A.'s in the history of Gotham, lowest due to the events surrounding the return of her childhood best friend and everything that came after that. Although, she ruefully acknowledged that could have something to do with the fact that she was Bruce Wayne a.k.a. Batman's friend and was under his protection. This was in evidence with how he was able to use a voice modifier that make Joker's henchman think that he was the self described Clown Prince of Crime who was calling off the use of both Rachel and Harvey, derailing his plan to use them both although more so Rachel as leverage points to get Bruce to do something that would destroy part of himself. Rachel had never been more proud of Bruce than she was at learning later after everything had calmed down that Bruce was able to free both her and Harvey without the use of violence.

In fact it would appear that Bruce used psychology to trick the Joker into telling him and the Gothem PD where he had stowed both her and Harvey. While the Joker was taunting Bruce about not being able to save both her and Harvey, he had been asking question in a manner that didn't register to the Joker that it was important information, so the clown prince answered it without thinking about it. Apparently, Bruce's battle with Crane had a positive affect. The look of relief on Harvey's face when he saw her paled at the relief she felt knowing that Bruce figured out the Joker's plan and was able to rescue them both, apparently when the Joker told him that Harvey was at Avenue X and Cicero, Bruce got suspicious and trick the Joker into confirming that she was at where he said Harvey was and vice versa. The fact that she instantly knew that it was Bruce, not Harvey, who figured out where she was didn't occur to her until she was safely able to think the last few days through.

Life went on the way she thought it would for a while after that. She and Harvey put in long hours at the firm, with occasional appearances at fund raisers or Bruce's parties that he would throw in the rebuilt manor of his ancestors, she was pleased that he rebuilt the manor in a warmer template; remembering from when they were children that he had felt that the mansion was cold and aloof. As she grew older Rachel began to wonder if this had something to do with Bruce's relationship, of lack of, with his father before his parent's unfortunate death. This was also one of the reasons she never pursued a romantic relationship with Bruce, regardless of what she said to him after the Scarecrow episode. The fear that Bruce, in his need to keep her safe when he was unable to save his parent's led her to keep him at arms length in fear of him smothering her if she let him all the way in. Sometimes she wanted to try to convince Bruce, or get Alfred to convince Bruce, to seek psychiatric help in dealing with the events of his past leading up to the present. Giving what happened with Crane however always made her pause any time she started to put that plan into action.

Given the way that Bruce acted after his parent's death, compiled with his ability to hide the scared little boy the death produced; the personae he had built for himself as a way to avenge their death in Batman, Rachel thought that he would never quit his alter ego. Especially how it gave him a way to deal with all of the pain and anguish of his parent's death; turning it outward, instead of letting it consume him. The fact that he stepped down as Batman roughly a year after the Joker first came to town and tried to take over the crime in Gotham, with the help of a psychiatrist that Alfred found for him, shocked her and, made her wonder if she really knew her old friend after all.

Even though Batman was no longer around as much; if there was something that Gotham PD was being choked by Batman was always there to lend a hand. One of the times that Bruce in his alter-ego was helping Harvey and Gordon with something Rachel found herself at the rebuilt Wayne manor having tea and cookies with Alfred, as she and Bruce used to do when she was a little girl. It was that time that she asked Bruce closest companion how her friend was, Alfred answer surprised her.

Alfred looked at Rachel with a very stern disposition and asked if he could speak plainly. After she replied in the affirmative Rachel got a response that she didn't expect.

"Master Bruce is fading away, a fact that causes me great concern. He had put so much of himself into the persona of Batman that it puts a great emotional strain on him. It is only my memories of what my squad mates went through after Burma that has given me any kind of ability at helping Master Bruce with the psychological strain of his alter-ego." Alfred said with a weary sigh; after taking a sip of tea the elder butler continued, "While I looked forward to the day that master Bruce no longer had to roam the streets of Gotham supplementing the police force, yet I worry what he can find for himself that will give him the same sense of purpose. All men need a sense of purpose, as do all women.", Alfred said, "His turning into a recluse and dashing off at a moments notice for anything that strikes his fancy does allow him the ability to regain some of what he had lost in his preparation for his plan to clean up this city that he loves and lost his parents to. I had hoped that his giving up the mantle of Batman would lead to him finding himself as well. The fact that of the people he truly trusts and can confide in is just me and Lucius is somewhat problematic, us both being in his employ."

To Rachel's shock she never thought about that. Between trying to distance her heart from Bruce, to her and Harvey's duties as DA's compiled soon after by planning their wedding, she realized that the last time she saw Bruce in something resembling the friendship they used to share was before she met Harvey. In fact the last time she even had something remotely like a conversation with Bruce was at the fundraiser he threw for Harvey. Although given that Bruce was hosting it; and Harvey was the guest of honor she mostly spent time waiting for it to be over, given that the only people at the fundraiser she was comfortable spending time with out of work was Harvey, Bruce and Alfred and all three of them were working in some capacity or another; making conversations with any of them that night difficult if not impossible giving that Harvey was being glad-handed by so many people that he said that if felt like his arm was going to fall off. Bruce in his duties as that host seem to be spending his time mingling with his/Harvey's guest, always away from Rachel it seemed. Alfred was to busy overseeing the waiters and prepping the number of people Wayne employees who were on hand as the clean-up crew.

Thinking back now she wonders if she stubbornly agreed to stay proposed out of spite after Bruce stepped down when Harvey asked if she wanted to break up, stating that he didn't want to be anyone's second choice. Rachel, still mad at Bruce for proving her so wrong, quickly assured Harvey that she wanted to marry him. Her and Harvey's wedding, which should have been a beautiful affirmation of their feelings for each other, was tense in that she had to watch Bruce with his date for the evening; one Selina Kyle, as they danced and chatted with the other guest at the ceremony with ease. A large part of her wanted to storm over to where Bruce was, grab him, drag him off and demand to know what he thought of showing up at her wedding, flaunting his availability now that she was a married woman. In hindsight when she thought back on the reception while on her honeymoon she realized the way she handled the situation was the right one, getting into a fight with a old friend over the fact that he'd brought a date that he was apparently enamored by would be a disservice to all involved. She'd used Harvey to grow away from Bruce, why should she deny Bruce the same. The fact that she thought Bruce would be too wrapped up in Batman to be able to do so was ignored at the time.

Her scrapbook of 'Wayne sightings" that she had keep in the interim that Bruce was missing being found by Harvey while they were helping each other move into their penthouse apartment cause one of the first non-work related argument of their relationship. An argument that led her to storm out of her new co-owned apartment to a paralegal she was friendly with at the firm. Sally asked her who she love, when Rachel couldn't answer that Sally instead asked who she thought she was more likely to have an actual partnership with. While she was unnerved at her uncertainty at whom it was she love, at the time; given that they had similar jobs, couple by the fact that she _**knew**_ that Bruce would never give up what had given him so much purpose to the point that a relationship no matter who with would give her friend that same sense of purpose. So with some pain in her heart at might have been, Rachel let Bruce go confident that once he understood her reasoning he would be fine with it as it gave him more time to be Batman, guilt free. To her consternation this is not what happened.

Although she didn't realize it at the time, her and Harvey's relationship deteriorated almost immediately upon starting it; the long hours, coupled with the fact that Harvey proposed to her and she accepted roughly three and a half months into their courtship lead to a relationship where neither of them truly knew each other. This still had the potential to be a fruitful union, their relationship wouldn't be the first the come together before either of the partner had a good understanding of where they stood. However the fact that Rachel accepted the proposal for the wrong reason, and she and Harvey never even took the time to learn each other doomed their relationship from the start.

The main thing that should have threw up big flags to her was the fact that she and Harvey never did any of the normal things that couples did when they planned a wedding, or should she say they never did them together. Eating dinner alone, while studying wedding magazine and sharing text where the order of planning their wedding, going to cake tasting appointments separately when they had the time, under the scornful and pitying gaze of the attendants wasn't how she thought her wedding would go when she was a little girl. The person she was getting married to was also different from who she thought when she was a little girl.

Given the amount of time their jobs took out of them her and Harvey were unable to have the wedding that Rachel had planned for them, instead of a big church wedding a small ceremony on the front steps of city hall with some of their friends from work and her mother was how Mr. and Mrs. Dent exchanged vows. At the time Rachel thought this was all she needed, both her father and Harvey's parents had died earlier and they didn't have many friends to worry about; working long hours at you job somewhat takes away opportunities for friendships, save for casual work friends. The party the Bruce threw for them a couple of weeks later was nice, Harvey though that Bruce was very different then the way the media had presented him (giving up the mantle of Batman had led Bruce to cutting back on his "playboy" appearances). Rachel just steamed thinking that Bruce was rubbing her nose in the life that she had given up when she decided to pin her hopes on Harvey instead of Bruce.

Rachel had thought of asking for a "trial' separation but didn't. Being raised catholic, to her parents a "trial separation" was the same as a divorce. When she talked with her mother about it Rachel got the unhelpful advice to "try and make it work by finding what drew you to each other in the first place". "Well, mom that's somewhat difficult due to the fact that we work so much that we don't have time to do anything else now that Batman has reset the cop and courts to how they should be." Rachel's mother gave a scoff, reminding her of how her mother had always thought of Batman as a glory seeking vigilantly that believed he was above the courts and could take the law in his hands. Rachel had to bite her tongue when her mother got in to the part of her rant about how if the elder Wayne's had lived they would have used their monetary and political power to stop Batman, and why isn't Bruce doing anything about this. Elsa Dawes thought that the sun rose and set on Harvey Dent and was of the opinion that he was the only reason that they had the peace and prosperity in Gotham that they had now. Although she agreed that her old employer's child did do a good turn by stopping being a playboy and actually stand up and facing the responsibilities that his parents left him. Rachel almost bit her tongue bloody when she overheard her mother grumbling to herself how she had thought Bruce and Rachel would have been a good paring, and how lucky Rachel was to have avoided that. Rachel arguing that Bruce was coming to terms with his parents' death finally after being away for Gotham for so long was not taken well by her mother. Not surprising that was one of the last times mother and daughter had spoken to one another.

Rachel had thought of packing up and just leaving Gotham behind her, but for better or for worst Gotham was her home and even with how dangerous it was she couldn't think of living anywhere else, although between Bruce, the DA's and GPD's efforts it was a good deal safer than it was when she was growing up. She would just have to learn to live with the disappointment that she had let her life turn into. Upon realizing this Rachel picked up he next case file and started taking notes to help prepare for the preliminary hearing she had coming up.


End file.
